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Hide-n-seek is the best game! One time I hid in my bedroom closet for hours – my siblings said they tried super hard to find me and finally started watching tv hoping I’d come out, and of course didn’t forget about me. 

Tib also loves to play hide-n-seek! She puts her head down and counts (in her head) while I hide. I ALWAYS WIN! See?? I’m really good. Between games, I make cards for RSVP (because they pay us The Big Bucks to license the Art) and squeeze in designing a few cards for our own line, THAT DEFY ANY CATEGORY.

I heard (via Facebook) we had a lot of snow last week but I don’t know what to believe because I locked myself in my bedroom and closed the… how do you say?? Blankets… on the windows?? Oh, BLINDS. Sunshine and warm weather only leads to selfish behavior and I’d much rather spend my days emailing Jen and the Intern about the Spring release and organizing my tax documents. Spoiler Alert: we chose 12 cards and my tax guy wept with joy when he received my paperwork. (But through his tears, he mumbled something about me being second to none.) 

Before my self-imposed deadline arrives, I have time to disclose the two cards that nearly made me exit my cloistered life:

Oh, and despite my other critical obligations, I managed to do some pro bono (Latin for dope) work for a worthy cause: Putting together a podcast for the fine folks at The MS Gym. Anyway, I know what you’re thinking, it’s about time she learned about RSSs and XMLs.

Silverfish are not really fish and not made of a precious metal. But they do love my bedroom. Observe:

I’d like to say I smashed that one but I didn’t and it probably used my sleeping body as a jungle gym. I have already smashed members of its family and I thought that’d be a warning but obviously it’s not. Now I sleep with a sock on my head and zipped up to the tippy-top in a neoprene bag. But I laugh as I drift off to sleep because I want the silverfish to know I’m not afraid and my kids to know that I’m not insane. HAHA!

I know we made it through another winter because I can hear the toads mating and my neighbor snoring. City-life is so full of intrigue! Who knows, this hawk

could be guilty of butchering all those baby bunnies?? Why am I so quick to blame my domesticated house pets??

Anyway, it’s almost June and that reminds me that school is almost over. 🙂

Millie

brought me a freshly murdered baby bunny.

And after I was done screaming hysterically, cursing the guilty,

and watching my friend scoop up the body with a shovel, I made a card.

As my eyeball filled with blood,

I thought to myself, “should I have someone redo my hearth,

or stop working on our 2017 catalog?”

I decided to both because I’m an over-achiever.

AND THEN I wrote a card

because it’s cheaper than therapy.

…El Niño. I know I’m supposed to be cursing Climate Change… I KNOW.

But how can I curse when meteorologists are predicting a warmer-than-usual winter??

I must embrace the phenomenon the way a mother embraces her wayward son.

IN OTHER NEWS, Jen and I chose 12 cards for the next release using darts, a cardboard cutout of Steve Buscemi, and our first-aid kit.

Here’s a teaser:And because I always plan ahead, here’s a new Father’s Day card:

I’m not sure if he was gently curb-stomped, or he bit into a fresh apple. Either way, he lost his front teeth.

It’s easy!

Old folks like Misao Okawa credit their longevity to poached eggs and whiskey.

Oh, I can do that.

It was Jen’s birthday yesterday. She celebrated by cramming her car with kids and driving East for five hours.

I celebrated by going to my In-Laws to hear some family history —  a combination of Downton Abbey and Angela’s Ashes.

BUT before these festive events, I gave Jen a card:Perhaps you recognize that man?His pants are usually radioactive, but not for this card.