Posts in Jen
I heard (via Facebook) we had a lot of snow last week but I don’t know what to believe because I locked myself in my bedroom and closed the… how do you say?? Blankets… on the windows?? Oh, BLINDS. Sunshine and warm weather only leads to selfish behavior and I’d much rather spend my days emailing Jen and the Intern about the Spring release and organizing my tax documents. Spoiler Alert: we chose 12 cards and my tax guy wept with joy when he received my paperwork. (But through his tears, he mumbled something about me being second to none.)
Before my self-imposed deadline arrives, I have time to disclose the two cards that nearly made me exit my cloistered life:
Oh, and despite my other critical obligations, I managed to do some pro bono (Latin for dope) work for a worthy cause: Putting together a podcast for the fine folks at The MS Gym. Anyway, I know what you’re thinking, it’s about time she learned about RSSs and XMLs.
When I need to know what month it is I just observe the animals around me. Simple!
HANG IN THERE, TIB – only 25 days till April!
Jen and The Intern and I are taking a break from a heated discussion about which cards should be dumped and which cards should be spared. Decisions like this require heartlessness and detachment. I don’t even care because I replaced my heart with an alligator’s heart. (COLD BLOODED.) I threw the dumped cards in the alley just to prove how much I didn’t care.
(That’s one of the dumped cards and I STILL DON’T EVEN CARE.)
I already moved on.
Loretta modeled the gift we got for The Intern (to make sure it felt festive) and it sat under the tree until yesterday because she says her pipes froze.
Maybe Loretta can wear two of those Christmas stockings.
We still have one present under the tree and if the recipient doesn’t claim it soon I’ll just have to keep it for myself. #MERRYCHRISTMAS
Between stalking housepets
and watching scandalous/made-for-Netflix adaptations of Margaret Atwood novels,
I’ve been working on THE PERFECT thank you card to stuff in our online orders. Jen and the Intern keep rejecting everything I make and that’s really hard on my fragile ego.
It never bothered me that the lenses in my glasses were rubber cemented into place and the rubber cement collected sand. I ditched those glasses under a fold in my beach towel so I could run down to the ocean and freely forage for low-tide sea creatures.
It was a free-range life! I wasn’t tethered by social convention! Or hygiene! Fast forward 35 years and I’m still leading a free-range life. Not tethered by social convention! Or hygiene! Today, our press lurched and lunged as if possessed but it was nothing a plastic shim couldn’t fix. See, free-range living!
That’s a filthy, oil-soaked floor and Jen throws cards to the ground when she’s angry. She leads a free-range lifestyle too! THAT’S HOW WE MAKE IT WORK.
(FYI: This is how our beloved C&P looks when Jen isn’t angry:)
Speaking of free-range, I made a new card for all of you (non-vegetarian) LOVERS out there.
Amid controversy and drama (will Jen and Fran ever non-violently agree on paper and envelope colors??
Will the Intern and Tib the Cat ever get along??
WILL FRAN’S MOM EVER STOP LOOKING LIKE FRAN IN 1979/Will Fran ever stop looking in the mirror???)
the New Release is finally done and will be added to the line as soon as I’m done looking in the mirror.
After a shivering and tearful debate, Jen and I (NO THANKS TO THE INTERN WHO SPENT THE LAST FIVE WEEKS TRAIPSING ABOUT EUROPE AND NOT INTERNING) chose the cards for our next release.
Here is a teaser:
FINALLY a card for all of the Trekkies and exotic fish lovers!
Stay tuned for paper and envelope choices! DON’T CLOSE THIS PAGE.
Now that Jen and I are savvy businesswomen we know what it means to write something off and it turns out you cannot write off costumes and puppets, even if they are used for self-expression?? Thank God for our tax guy or we’d be in a Dickensian debtors prison.
Speaking of handfuls of money, I need to get back to writing/designing cards for our next release. Quit trying to distract me with wildfires and Lifetime movies.
Loretta has come such a long way – from an unnamed fetus to sorting wood type.
I doubt she even remembers special moments we shared…
I told her that being my Foot-Twin means she has a lot to live up to and she told me I was crazy. WHATEVER, LORETTA.
While Jen puts her to work in the shop, I’m going to spend the next few weeks admiring my own feet and designing new astrology cards. WHO’S CRAZY NOW, LORETTA??
Jen has her hair done before she picks up Tib
and Tib sharpens her claws on a fence post. It all works out because they both understand strength is tied to beauty and Jen wears kevlar long underwear.
In other news, my niece is getting married in a few weeks so I made her a card:
I apologize in advance.