Blog - Family

After coughing the web of mucus from my throat, it was time to choose paper and envelope colors for the Spring Release.Dinah told me later that she was plotting my murder while I took this photo.

Oh, Dinah! What will make you snap?!

Wait, tell us more about the web of mucus!

No! No more. Onto more important things.

Like frogs im Deutschland.Who needs pants when you have legs like that? Amiright??

Chickenpox?Broken femur?SERIOUSLY???

Nothing could come between a girl and her Etch A Sketch in 1981.NOTHING.

Just look at that tight-lipped concentration… LOOK AT IT.Maybe I was creating a message for my mom? Or a beautiful design? Or a note to my brother begging him to stop slowly poisoning my parakeet and calling me Oot Head.

WHO KNOWS?

My Etch A Sketch has been replaced with 10,000 pounds of letterpress equipment, a laptop, and Jen. (Sorry, Jen.)

Here’s a new Valentine’s Day card… Lead type and an antique cut can barely compare to the magic of my childhood.

I’m pretty sure it was our Jewish neighbor (and not Santa Claus) who put our presents under the tree when we were at Midnight Mass.

I got a globe.But I barely remember that! I barely remember crying and sulking in my bedroom! Because this was the Lord’s day, not mine!

Merry Christmastime, everyone!

If only they would stop their playing and look over at me… Why is MY friend even playing with my stupid brother???… Maybe if I wave my arms and jump higher on this strangely super-tall bed in our basement… No, that didn’t work… Hold on… I’ll just climb down and drag over that chalkboard to lay flat on the floor because it looks more like water than the off-brown linoleum… Perfect… Now, I’ll roll over the large black, rubber inner-tube we float on at the lake… Just plop it right on top of the chalkboard… Looking good… Ok… NOW, I’ll climb back up on the bed and jump some more…

“LOOK AT MEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!”

I hysterically scream, while diving face-first into the center of the inner-tube.So much blood. So many tears. And my friend was sent home??? WHY MOM, WHY?!

Thank you, Religion News Service, for appreciating the ho-ho-Holiday-humdrum-hole-filling.  And thank you, Dinah the Cat, for understanding the true meaning of Christmas.And you’re right, you should be in the new Christmas card.

Did I even see Jen on her birthday last week??

Hmm, I don’t think so… But I still made her a card because my love for her just bubbles over and soils the stovetop with a sort of gravy that becomes crusty and has to be scraped off months later with steel wool and maybe a knife.

Whew!

That’s a lot of love!GET IT?!?! CAT-SUP???

Omg, it just doesn’t stop over here!

I’ve observed the greedy, groping limbs of an Octopus on television.

I SEE YOU, OCTOPUS.

I SEE YOUR SELF-INDULGENT, FLESH-LIKE, SUCTION-COVERED BOUGHS, BUMPING ALONG THE OCEAN FLOOR.Sea Creatures are on my mind because I’m back in Barnstable. Ah, Barnstable. How is it possible for the sunsets to always fill me with awe, the hammock to always fill me with peace, and people to always fill my belly with booze on the deck overlooking the Great Salt Marsh?IT’S A TOUGH LIFE.

Kids (like mine) graduated last week,houses were open, cards (stuffed with money) were given… And I realized, THESE KIDS NEED THANK YOU CARDS.

And always the giver, I made this:I forced my son to read this handy blog post about proper thank you note writing.

You’re welcome.

My cards express all of the feelings for Mother’s Day.

Done.