October 28, 2014

Life is like the murky end of our lake and you'll have to dump in a 10 lb. bag of Aquacide Pellets if your mom isn't there to rake the weeds away.

What is she talking about?

Don't act like you don't know.

Do you need a Congratulations-ish card?

You do?!

October 20, 2014

It only took a few minutes to have a mole removed last week (my chest tube scar needed a BFF) and I texted Jen when it was done, exclaiming my relief at the speediness of the procedure.

She told me that that was the easy part.

That's the way our relationship works — I get my head all full of smells of burnt flesh and joy, and Jen tethers my helium balloon to the doorknob.

It works. IT WORKS.

It's time, once again, to print cards for the new release.

Choosing a corresponding envelope color can be difficult, and when Lucy or Loretta are unavailable we use another neutral third party.

See how intense she is?


PS: You know we didn't win Martha's American Made Award competition. Stop asking.


October 14, 2014

We find out on Friday if Martha is adopting us — I already packed my bags. I told Jen to pack hers but I don't think she heard me as she was pealing out of the driveway with her windows rolled up. Oh, Jen!

We (Jen) started printing the new release today, and to celebrate, Millie left Jen a present right in front of Zeichen Press HQ.

It only seemed appropriate that this card be printed first:

The rest of the week (until the adoption), we (Jen) will be printing all of the new cards:

October 10, 2014

I see it! October 13th is the Dim Light at the End of the Dark Tunnel... The Big Day.

The last day to vote for us.

Despite my well documented crippling math anxiety,

I've done some calculations: 4 days of voting remaining x 6 votes per day = 24 votes per person.

You better double-check that number/go vote! <--That's the link!


October 3, 2014

I barely wept with gratitude when I found out Minnesota Business Magazine wanted to write about Zeichen Press for Martha Stewart's American Made competition... And when Minnesota Business Magazine writer, Erica Rivera, told me to hush my pretty mouth so she could interview me, I did hush my pretty mouth. I do as I'm told. I DO.

Anyway, Erica wrote this masterpiece:

And then I scooped the litter box.

AND here's a page about litter boxes from my STILL UNSOLD book:

September 28, 2014

Remember how I promised that when my painkillers wore off, I'd make a card based on The Lung Collapsing Event? It turns out that I only needed them for a couple of days and flushed the rest ~ DON'T GET ANY IDEAS ~ and then I made this breakup card:


September 26, 2014

Recovering from a collapsed lung is the perfect time to learn all about hashtags.

Thank you, lung!

I obsessively tweeted and nagged everyone on Facebook. I'M SORRY EVERYONE.

Wait, #HelpMe.

It's been a trending/not-trending rollercoaster-week for Zeichen Press...


But may the best (wo)man (named Fran and Jen) win. Did I mention that you have to vote 6x every day through October 13th? And did I mention that my doctor told me that my other lung will collapse if we don't win??

PS: I made a new Mother's Day card...


September 15, 2014

Running for student council vice president of my Freshman class was so stressful! Our platform was twofold:

1) Instruct — and therefore unify — our class via a comprehensive Class Cheer: "Nine-tee! Nine-tee! Ninetyninetyninety nine-tee!!! YAYYYY!!"

2) Oh, I guess it was only a onefold platform...

NEEDLESS TO SAY, votes were cast, and I won. It was a real nail-biter.

SPEAKING OF VOTING, you can finally start voting for Zeichen Press here!

And you can (and should!!) vote 6x per day! SIX TIMES. PER DAY.