Posts in Franimals
Hide-n-seek is the best game! One time I hid in my bedroom closet for hours – my siblings said they tried super hard to find me and finally started watching tv hoping I’d come out, and of course didn’t forget about me.
Tib also loves to play hide-n-seek! She puts her head down and counts (in her head) while I hide. I ALWAYS WIN! See?? I’m really good. Between games, I make cards for RSVP (because they pay us The Big Bucks to license the Art) and squeeze in designing a few cards for our own line, THAT DEFY ANY CATEGORY.
Whenever Jen goes out of town, Millie prays
that I can hold the Zeichen Press fort down… Or maybe she’s praying for a bath? Or better kibble?? WE’LL NEVER KNOW. Between weighing packages – packaged by the Intern,
and photographing old cards reprinted with poppin’ fresh ink,
I scour antique newspapers for graphics drawn by long-dead art directors
so I can REPURPOSE them into greeting cards that will be (fingers crossed!) added to the line.
(SAFE TRAVELS, JEN/DON’T GET EATEN BY A SHARK.)
The most important part of getting ready for the Cape is downloading important apps. The Sharktivity app is my latest obsession because tide charts are boring and knowledge of shark activity is a guaranteed conversation kickoff!
Try it yourself:
You: Water is closed due to blood in the water north of the life guarded beach…
Them: Whaaat, closed due to blood in the water??!! Well, that’s crazy!! Do you think it’s seal blood or human??
Who could resist that conversation?! Oh, and hopefully the Lovebirds coming with me don’t have their limbs ripped off (by a shark) before they get married. STAY TUNED.
Jen went above and beyond her usual role (Queen of Letterpress) when she took my protagonist/muse to the vet for a wounded paw. We knew it was bad when it looked like Mickey Mouse’s gloved hand (hand?). (AND NOT A MINUTE SOONER.)
Here is Tib at the Uptown Vet… See how she gingerly lifts her damaged digits?
I WANT TO POST A CLOSE-UP SO BAD. Just imagine pus oozing out of a furless area between her toe phalanges. But why was it furless?? STOP ASKING QUESTIONS.
While Jen was busy watching vet techs handle My Very Own Tasmanian Devil with (LITERALLY) Hawk Gloves,
I was busy making a Mother’s Day card. This company is obviously 50/50.
Is it sad that Millie only has two baths per year? Maybe.
But when she gets too unpleasant to be around, I know it’s time to release our Spring cards, AND she is shorn like a sheep on the English countryside!Speaking of the English countryside, I had to watch an entire season of Escape to the Country on Netflix
so I could pretend their expansive views were mine.
Winter was saving one last blizzard for the weak but I escaped by hiding under the bed and burying my face in my hands.
I’m not into conspiracies but as soon as I paid my taxes, the sun came out and it was time (for Jen and the Intern) to print and for us to choose paper and envelope colors. Tib the Cat just wanted to be part of it but the Intern held her back with a freshly printed card while we convinced her to not show fear because as soon as Tib senses fear, she attacks.
We watched one woman take control of the situation. It was pretty amazing.
AND THEN, another amazing thing happened…
I donned my favorite costume (a witch) and redesigned a card with the help of the Zeichen Press Team: (Millie, Tib, and Dinah. I’M KIDDING!) Jen and the Project Manager aka The Intern!
I asked them to also put on costumes and despite their icy stares, I know they love me.)
Here’s the card: Coming this Spring to a shop near you!
I am still focused on birthday cards every day but
I make time to obsessively google Novara Big Buzz Bike. Oh, I’ll find one. MARK MY WORDS. When Pam the Cat got smashed by a car, I looked to Craigslist for another kitten to fill the cat-hole-sized space in my heart — enter: Tib.
Different than being raised from the dead (a la Lazarus
or Gage from Pet Semetary – a book I didn’t whip across the room in the middle of the night, circa 1988. Just kidding, I did whip it across the room, circa 1988.) Thanks to Craigslist, bikes and cats can be replaced!
When I need to know what month it is I just observe the animals around me. Simple!
HANG IN THERE, TIB – only 25 days till April!
Jen and The Intern and I are taking a break from a heated discussion about which cards should be dumped and which cards should be spared. Decisions like this require heartlessness and detachment. I don’t even care because I replaced my heart with an alligator’s heart. (COLD BLOODED.) I threw the dumped cards in the alley just to prove how much I didn’t care.
(That’s one of the dumped cards and I STILL DON’T EVEN CARE.)
I already moved on.
My firstborn turned 26 yesterday and between bites of angel food cake, I did the math and figured out that’s more than 6 years older than I was when he was born. I invited him over when I was done with my calculations. He tied a cloth napkin on Millie’s head because he was so grateful that I saved him some birthday cake. Oh, to be young!
I’ll give him this card in about 40 years:
I scream that repeatedly the morning after a substantial snowfall – it’s really helpful and my family appreciates it so much.
When I’m done warning everyone on my block, I always feel inspired: